I'm sure you got here because you got somehow depressed in your past life, or maybe now. Don't get me started, being depressed really sucks. But somehow, being depressed also helps us to become stronger as we look forward in life. Ladies and gents out there, let me share my most depressing moments and how do I cope with them immediately. Because I tell you, I don't forcibly resist them, I let them be until everything's fine, but I take measures of course. I rationalize everything about the problem, and somehow, we get desperate, sometimes we give up. But it ain't the time, because it's just one of the stepping stones to actually do and be good throughout your life.
5. I just lost my the biggest competition, yet, of my life
Who doesn't even want to be competitive, right? Everyone does, maybe. Furthermore, I was in my teenage years and I was going to join a national tech contest hosted in Singapore, where the goal is to make the most beautiful and most original machine in the fields of robotics within the local. I was in Singapore, and my family was in another country, they were hoping so much for me to win, and the expectations were really high. So I said to myself that I have to win this, because if not, maybe my family will get disappointed at me. That was just my main goal during those times. The contest was starting where it happened in a University in Nanyang. My heart really thumped so fast that I wanted to rip it out so just it would stop. Well, I was so stressed during that day, even though we were working as a team, I just don't have enough trust on myself.
As it eventually started, we were getting to our positions so that we could finish individual tasks as fast as we could. My job in my team was supposed to be programming the logic of the bot and its functional programs. I got really stressed than before, than I stopped for ten minutes, while the contest time was ongoing. My team was really hurrying to finish while I was there going to cry soon. The time just finished and we didn't even made it to assembling the parts of the machine. We presented a mess to the contest panel and we got disappointed in ourselves. I really don't know how am I supposed to tell this to my family, since as I said, the expectations were really high. I just, you know, don't know, maybe spend time alone, how am I gonna go home now?
Then our tech mentor approached me as I saw her nearby, she asked me, why I wasn't joining my team on our camp? I said, "It was kinda my fault that we lost." She immediately stopped me, then she said, "You know that no one wants any of that, even your team, they aren't blaming you for losing, in fact, they are happily talking back there, why don't you join them?". I said, "But my family is really expecting me to get the best out of this contest because they just told me they're betting on me, how am I supposed to tell them now? And I just told them that this is yet, the biggest contest of my life.". "I'm sure they'll understand about it, they're your family! And you know, failure is a stepping stone towards success, and without it, you won't surely belong to that desired position of yours. Come back to the camp now, we'll wait for you.". As soon as she stopped speaking, she stood up and walked slowly back to the camp. I just realized that I was acting too much dramatic, she does have a point. I should just tell it to my family, I mean, what could possibly go wrong? As I called my mother, I told everything that happened, and in the end, she congratulated me, and she talked about having that opportunity which is more less than others, and you were lucky that you stepped foot to where you are now. After that, relief struck me and I got back to my camp.
4. I just failed my entrance exam to my dream university
Have you every dreamed of going to your dream university studying in your dream course? I sure hope almost everyone. But you know, in my case, I have this dream university, in fact, I visit the place almost three times a month, just to look at the beautiful scenery, the garden, the halls, the pavilions, and the grandeur statue of the university. The title of being an engineer really impressed me, and it was my dream in the first place. That is why I made a dozens of research on how to get there, such as the requirements, the minimum school ratings and more. Well, I had to say, it is really hard to get there since they standards really looked like it was only made for nerdy studs. Despite that fact, I still did what I had to do, I studied for the aptitude examination, each of the required sub-tests and more. The aptitude exam was supposed to take place in the early summer. So I had plenty of time to take a look back at my lectures and research the web. I admit that it was hard taking all of them at once, and for that, I was pressured more. And I don't what to do if I fail the exam because it is really my dream university.
Well, here goes the exam, damn bro, the technical exams were really hard. Science was hard, I admit. Too much analysis and remembering, but despite that, I still made it. Language proficiency was really easy peasy for me. I was too confident because of that, even though knowing that the technical exams were really hard. We had to wait for at least four months after the examinations and the results shall be released online.
Months passed by, and I was eagerly waiting in front of my computer, I just woke up pretty early during that day, I was really nervous, maybe I just won't look at it. There is still a mix of confidence and nervousness. And I saw the message, "We regret to inform you...". Sadness just burst inside me. I looked stressed the whole day, and my mom just noticed me. "What's wrong?" She asked. Well, I confessed that I didn't made it. She patted me, and said, "That's okay! It's not about the school or university you are about to enter to, mostly it's just about you! How you drive yourself towards success, and you do it with passion, this I tell you, do things with passion and you'll go towards success. This is not the end, see your true calling, know what you're really good at. In the end, you'll find your happy place." I introspected and she was right, it's about what I do with passion, and what am I really good at. She's just right.
3. My friend since childhood just betrayed me.
This one here still hits me until now, the sadness of the fact that my own best friend since we were five. I don't really know what to say or what to feel or what to think during those days, because I really look lost and I feel alone. Well, the story goes like this, I'll call him Jasper. Jasper was my friend, we were classmates since nursery until we got to third-year high school. Well, we got separated at the fourth year, and it kinda hurts knowing that we aren't going to the same class anymore. He somehow got lost since he flunked his technical subjects and our professor just didn't gave him a chance to compensate with his irresponsibility. We knew each other so much, we knew our weakness, and we go to each other if we get to our saddest days.
Going back to the story, I was a shy person back then, yet if they knew me, they'll tell I'm charismatic either way. Some of my classmates during third year are gossiping about me, talk about how much I suck, really men? Of all the people, why me? Then it goes, the gossiping person just had a secret talk leaking disgusting fake info about me, I just knew eventually that Jasper just slipped an information that was really confidential between us, and no people was really supposed to know about that except me and him. He admitted that, he slipped the information, but he also claimed that it wasn't intentional, the big bully gossiping boys that joined the girls were supposed to threaten and force him to slip the gossip right away. He apologized to me sincerely, and he admitted his fault, but he just did it just to protect himself from the bullies. I got depressed during those days, because I felt like my best friend just betrayed me, and second, there is always a feeling that the information would spread around the campus in no time.
We didn't mind each other for almost a month or two, and he always had that urge to talk to me about things, but he doesn't know how to get started. After some time, the bullies just got used to it and they stopped threatening others students. I realized in the end that after all, he's my friend for almost 13 years, why would I dump it for such thing? But I can't blame myself fear and hatred really covered me during those times. I forgave him and gave accepted his apology wholeheartedly.
2. The girl I liked rejected me, I felt devastated
I know I'm not the only one, maybe you? Come onnnnn, just admit it. Have you got on any relationship for while? Maybe in the past? Or maybe you will in the future? Whatever your answer is, it is inevitable to have this kind of feeling towards your opposite sex, and the feeling of romantic love to the girl you like is just, you know, so much revealing that your classmates starts to notice about it and they start to somehow slip it away around the class. That one day you'll be shocked if they knew about it even though you haven't told anything about it to them.
This girl I like, her name is Alice. Not Alice in Wonderland, lol. Okay, let's get to it. Alice was really a lovable girl, she's intelligence, she's very approachable, she's very pretty, she always had that charisma as my classmates claimed, well, I had to admit she really had that undying charisma. She had this milky white face, the smoothness, just satisfying even though you are just standing in front of her. Her body was just perfect, her eyes were remarkable, she had this perfect height for a girl, well, I don't know what's your standard for a girl's height. But she was as tall as me, well, not really, I'm an inch or two taller.
I don't really know how to confess my feelings for her. It's just that, I am scared for whatever is going to happen if I somehow reveal something to her. Such as how I like her, I had this very scary feeling when she starts busting me up. I just talked about this to my friends, and they pledged, as a brother, to help me in whatever ways, It was this afternoon when my friends started walking near Alice and her friends. They made some moves and small talks about how awesome I am when I'm around. The girls started to feel annoyed and they shifted to another table. I just told my friends to stop. Well you know, sometimes your friends gets you to doom. I just heard the voice of one of Alice's friend that Alice already has a crush in other section. And they were already getting along and just ya know, getting to know each other. After some time, Alice confessed that she recognized my efforts, but you know, she doesn't really like me, so she apologized afterwards. I really felt devastated while they were far.
When I got home, I cried for several hours, because all the fantasies, just gone! Well, ya asking me how did I cope with it? Well, I just made myself busy doing other things until I somehow forget about it. And when I do, I'll recognize that the lesson is, it's not about the girl you like, but you know it's okay, but it's about the one who cares for you truly and wholeheartedly regardless of whatever she looked like.
1. My most humble professor just passed away at age 43
Man, I don't even know how to get started on this, it's just because, it has been a devastating, sad, depressing week for me, since the day my professor died recently. He died on June 7, 2020. May his soul rest in peace. There's nothing much for me to say, he's been there for me when I was really pressured during my study days, he was just there, when I don't have someone to talk to. He was there, ready to spend his time with me to talk about my problems. He was really fun to talk to if you ask me, he was a very humble, down-to-earth guy. No words can express the generosity of the man I have met. His heart was really dedicated to those people around him. And unconditionally, he would give something to those who are in need, if he has something to give to. He was an altruistic man. He'll turn my saddest moments into most memorable ones once you talk about it to him, just I wished more person were just like him.
During previous two weeks, the internet connection really sucks, more technical problems exist because of the faulty line in my neighborhood, aside from that, the tech support of the internet provider really sucks, Well, I think that's understandable since a pandemic is ongoing and workforce is not really full at any agency or company that you'll see. I was really in bad luck since the internet does really suck for me during the past weeks. And I hope they get this fixed as soon as I call. Fortunately, one of their tech support answered my call and got to my address quickly, they fixed the line near the pole that caused the interruption. I was really eager to open my social media accounts after having a strong connection again.
Until this very saddening, devastating, news came to my feed. "Professor Felix died at 43, our deepest condolences." To my curiosity, I visited more links made me realized that he died of COVID-19. He was recently admitted to a hospital and I've just learned that he got his condition worse when he lately knew that he contracted the disease. I felt so depressed and devastated knowing that the humblest person I knew just passed away. Not only me, I'm sure we all are at our department.
I don't know how I'm going to cope with this, but I'm still happy that he was born and the legacy he left behind will never be forgotten and will always be cherished forever and ever, and surely he will be missed.
Do you have any depressive moments you want to share to us and how you coped with it? Share a sneak-peak at the comment section and let them featured on the part 2 of this blog.
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